(no subject)

[sprinkletheif]

i feel like HELL!

i can barely breathe. but hey, i finally woke up WITHOUT a migraine for the first time in MONTHS. that's a plus.

for some reason the giant pile of dirty clothes in the other room is REALLY bothering me today. mostly the smell i think. and the fact that any day off i have i can't stay awake for more than a half hour. i hate doing mountains of laundry. i miss when it was just two or three loads. i still have chocolate on my work shirt from picking up a box one of the new girls at work dropped ice cream on... OVER A WEEK AGO. and my work pants haven't been washed in... god i have no idea. i just simply do not have the energy to do that evil mountain of laundry therefore it will sit there and mock me forever. i don't think anyone understands this lack of energy - it's not "oh, i'd rather play on my computer" or "oh, i'd rather play with my friends" or "oh i'd rather watch TV" it's "oh, if i sit down i will pass the fuck out for hours." by the time i wake up the laundry room is closed. i'm too damn weak to take the mountain to the damn laundromat and knock it out in one fell swoop (and too broke right now) so yeah. it will stay there, growing and growing, swallowing what little bit of clean clothes i have left and the semi clean clothes as well. it's great, i'm like the stinky kid at school, i never had the honor of that before. now i smell like foot and swamp ass. does wonders for your self esteem. my house is a fucking disaster - it used to be so clean. there's something rotting in the sink, things that have been in the fridge for months, the bedroom is just a disaster and no matter how hard i try i just can't stay on top of the living room. i should just give up and let this place turn into the cesspool it's trying to become.

pretty much everything is bothering me today. has been for weeks. i try not to say anything though so as not to anger the natives or set anyone off. this will probably get me in trouble actually. fuck it, i never really post about how i feel unless i'm calling out invisible enemies without the balls to come to my face. i'm kinda tired of walking on eggshells.

did i mention i'm sick of not being able to breathe? i'm sure someone's got it worse so i don't know why i say anything, but it sucks. everything sucks.

i guess i'll shut up and pretend everything's fine again. i've got to get to class.

Comments

[skwyrm.livejournal.com]

I cleaned a few weeks ago. re-arranged the bedroom and everything. remember? the only "disaster" in the bedroom is the laundry. if I recall, the deal was you clean up after the animals and do the laundry, and I do the dishes and take out the trash and we both tidy up the house now and again. well I find myself doing laundry more often than not, getting bitched at for not doing it the "right" way, and catching shit for not doing the dishes often enuff to your liking...

and if staying "on top of the living room" is such a problem, get rid of the cats and put your dirty glasses in the goddamn sink when yer done with them.

christ

[indy-skies.livejournal.com]

don't pretend everything's fine when it isn't - that's just lying to yourself when you're writing. LJ is a great place to vent and i don't mind reading your venting entries one bit. have you seen the crap i've been writing about my life lately? haha... you haven't even reached that level. anyway, i'm sorry you're so sick and down. i've been there - if i weren't at home being taken care of by my mommy (gag... i know) i'd probably be there now. this may sound silly but when i've been down like that and not able to generate the energy to even brush my teeth i used to write down everything i had to do on little pieces of paper and then fold them up and put them in a plastic bag. then i'd draw them out of the bag one by one and get them done. all i had to do is get one job done and then i allowed myself to sleep or whatever for a while. the purpose of the bag and the drawing of the tasks is so that you can't just do one easy thing and call it quits. maybe something like this would work for you??

[woodfaery.livejournal.com]

Are you as tired as this kitty? If so, you must be very tired...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2GWPOPSXGYI

[matafleur.livejournal.com]

Of course we understand, it just takes too much energy to post a reply. :)

But really, the fatigue thing is a killer. It's like having only so many energy points a day - and sometimes things come along that take a way some of those points before you even wake up (like being sick, or a stressful schedule, etc). And sometimes the points you have left aren't enough to make it through the day, so you *try* to borrow some of tomorrows ... and then, where does that leave you the next day? :P It sucks big ones.


ps. No fair, you call them out.. they do nothing.
I post a comment on a friend's blog and get something
that resembles a 'chewing out'.